what a week!

it's been a tough one, but I think things are going to be looking up. When I go through days like these, it forces me to really look at myself, and I wind up learning more about myself and about life. So, in the end, I know I'll get through this, and I know I'll be better off because of it. It just stinks right now. I saw this coming, but this week, it actually happened. They're giving me two weeks to get the boys under control or they will be letting me go. In two weeks, my probationary period will be up. THis is the first job I've ever been told that I stink at. I know I stink at it too, which is even more frustrating. I told them before they hired me that I had no relevant experience and would need training, but now when push comes to shove, they'd rather let me go. I could see letting me go if I wasn't improving at all, or if I wasn't doing what was asked of me or if I had an attitude problem, but I am improving steadily and I have been very flexible. grrrr! I am starting to think that they were just using me while they were in a staffing crunch, but now that that is easing up they're done with me. Needless to say, I'm very frustrated at the state of my career since grad school. I've been having some tough luck. I guess maybe this one just wasn't meant to be. I'll let you know how my meeting went over the weekend.
On the brighter side, Big Guns and I have decided that if I lose this job, we will move ASAP. A piece of me is definitely looking forward to moving on from here, so i won't be overly crushed if I'm not able to salvage my current job. Neither one of us likes where we live. It's very isolating and not particularly safe feeling. We want to be a part of a community and have neighbors and be able to go for walks and things. With all of this said, please keep us in your prayers!